Blonde Quotes And Sayings [25 One Liners Funny W. Pictures]

blonde quotes

Looking for the funniest blonde one liner quotes? Here you can find the best as well as unique blonde quotes and sayings, compiled over the years from a variety of sources. Check it out!

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  1. Why was the blonde so disappointed when she got her license? She had gotten an F in sex!
  2. Why can’t blondes count to 70? Because 69 is a bit of a mouthful.
  3. What is a blonde’s favorite fairy tale? Humpme Dumpme!
  4. Why does a blond wear a tight skirt? To keep here legs closed.
  5. Why does a blonde wear green lipstick? Because red means Stop.
  6. What is the difference betwen a blonde and a Lamborghini? You don’t let your friends borrow your Lamborghini.
  7. What does the Bermuda Triangle and blondes have in common? They’ve both swallowed a lot of seamen.
  8. Why doesn’t a blonde talk during sex? Because her mother told her never to talk to strangers.
  9. Why do only 20 percent of blonde chicks lay Easter eggs? The rest are hunting peckers.
  10. What’s the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito stops sucking when you smack it.
  11. Two blondes fell down a hole. One said, “It’s dark in here isn’t it?” The other replied, “I don’t know; I can’t see.”
  12. Why do blondes always wash there hair? They just read the instructions. Lather… Rinse… Repeat…
  13. What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant? “Are you sure it’s mine?”
  14. What’s Blonde and dead in a closet? The Hide and Seek Champion from 1995.
  15. Why did the blond get fired from the banana plantation? Because she threw out all the bent ones.
  16. Two blondes fall down a well. One says to the other one, “Isn’t it dark down here?” She replies, “I don’t know. I can’t see.”
  17. How do you get a blonde to marry you? Tell her she’s pregnant.
  18. What do you call a blonde with pig tails? A blowjob with handlebars.
  19. What did the blonde say when someone blew in her ear? Thanks for the refill.
  20. If pink and glitter were vitamins blondes would be the healthiest people alive.
  21. What do you call a blonde between two brunettes? A mental block.
  22. 16 Blondes are standing outside the bar. Why didn’t they go in? The sign said 18+.
  23. What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blonde’s head? A Space Invader.
  24. Two blondes were driving to Disneyland. The sign said, “Disneyland Left”. So they started crying and went home.
  25. What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.

Closing words 

And with this, we come to the end of collection. It was great to have you till here.

So, which quote did you like the most in our compilation of blonde quotes funny.

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