25 Funny Quotes On Marriage Will Make You Fall In Love Again

marriage quotes

Looking for Inspirational Marriage Quotes? Here, we’ve put together some short, funny quotes and sayings for married couple that are sure to bring some giggles whether you share them together, or think about one another while you’re reading. Check it out!

RELATED: Best One Liners On Life, Love & Happiness [25 Quotes]

  1.  All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner.__ Red Skelton
  2. A husband is what is left of a lover, after the nerve has been extracted.__ Helen Rowland, Wedding Quotes
  3. A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.__ Michel de Montaigne
  4. The first time you marry for love, the second for money, and the third for companionship.__ Jackie Kennedy
  5. Marriage is neither heaven nor hell, it is simply purgatory.__ Abraham Lincoln. 
  6. By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.__ Socrates
  7. Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards.__ Benjamin Franklin, Funny Marriage Quotes
  8. It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.__ Friedrich Nietzsche
  9. They dream in courtship, but in wedlock wake.__ Alexander Pope
  10. There’s only one way to have a happy marriage and as soon as I learn what it is I’ll get married again.__ Clint Eastwood
  11. Happiness in marriage is entirely a matter of chance.__ Jane Austen. 
  12. The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.__ Henny Youngman, Wedding Day Quotes
  13. A journey is like marriage. The certain way to be wrong is to think you control it.__ John Steinbeck
  14. Let the wife make the husband glad to come home, and let him make her sorry to see him leave.__ Martin Luther
  15. Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside equally desperate to get out.__ Michel de Montaigne
  16. Before marriage, a girl has to make love to a man to hold him. After marriage, she has to hold him to make love to him.__ Marilyn Monroe
  17. Marriage is a bribe to make the housekeeper think she’s a householder.__ Thornton Wilder, Happy Marriage Quotes 
  18. Men have a much better time of it than women. For one thing, they marry later; for another thing, they die earlier.__ H. L. Mencken
  19. I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.__ Rita Rudner
  20. Instead of getting married again, I’m going to find a woman I don’t like and give her a house.__ Lewis Grizzard
  21. Don’t marry the person you think you can live with; marry only the individual you think you can’t live without. James Dobson
  22. A successful marriage is an edifice that must be rebuilt every day.__ Andre Maurois, Love Marriage Quotes
  23. Marriages, like careers, need constant nurturing… the secret of having it all is loving it all. Joyce Brothers
  24. A marriage without conflicts is almost as inconceivable as a nation without crises.__ Andre Maurois
  25. The best way to get most husbands to do something is to suggest that perhaps they’re too old to do it.__ Ann Bancroft

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Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy.

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